Despite my best intentions, I’ve often been disappointed in the lack of results from my praying. Since the death of my wife, however, I can honestly report more effectiveness than in any previous recollection.
But why? Perhaps because the trauma of death forced a shift in focus. Presenting God with only a list of needs no longer satisfied because I usually didn’t even know what to ask for in my extremity. Prayer has now become more of a closer relationship with the One who has invited me to come boldly before His throne and find mercy and grace to help in time of need. (Heb. 4:16).
What I describe here won’t necessarily be a pattern for others to follow exactly but simply an observation about how God seems to be working in this season of my life through three intertwining processes:
COMMUNICATING WITH GOD
When my son was small, he’d often ask me for things. And while I’d certainly grant some of his requests outright, what I really wanted to do was communicate with him so that we could understand each other and mutually arrive at the best decision. So we’d talk about the request and all its ramifications.
Thus my approach to God–my communication with Him– has largely taken the form of ongoing verbal conversations throughout the day. I literally speak aloud to God and explain puzzlements, issues, needs, anxieties, disappointments, sorrows, frustrations, loneliness, etc., as if confiding in a close personal friend from whom I withhold no secrets. I also ask questions and make requests. He understands, and verbalization (coupled with my Bible reading, of course) helps me gain clarification and insight.
This is reminiscent of conversations I used to have with my wife. We often rambled far afield from the original issue until we came to a resolution. There was seldom any quick fix.
CRYING OUT TO GOD
More so than ever before, I find my prayers punctuated by tears–real, hot and salty. They come without being beckoned and add urgency to my supplications. Does this make any difference? Perhaps. What parent won’t immediately attend to the needs and hurts of a weeping child? When Hezekiah cried out to God in deep distress of soul, God replied, “I have heard your prayers; I have seen your tears.” (Isa. 38:5). The combination found favor in heaven.
And though He was sinless and perfect, even Jesus Himself offered up prayers and supplications with loud cryings and tears–and was heard. (Heb. 5:7).
Tears often spring from a broken heart, and it’s comforting to know that “the Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” He sees and hears me right where I am. (Psa. 34:17-18).
COUNTING ON GOD
Pray without expecting an answer and you won’t likely be disappointed. We must actively, expectantly, persistently count on God to do all He has promised: to meet our needs (Php. 4:19), to give us wisdom (Jas. 1:5), to never leave us nor forsake us (Heb. 13:5) and so much more. But far too often the seeming impossibility of a situation causes me to doubt. God cannot lie (Tit. 1:2), and I must learn to count on Him to be true to His word.
If I pray according to His will, He will both hear and answer. (1 Jn. 5:14-15). When I’m unsure of His will, I consider some questions. For example, is my prayer in alignment with the clear principles of scripture? Is it consistent with how God has acted before? Is it a good thing that would bring glory to Him and advance His kingdom?
While not perfect, such thinking helps persuade me that if I don’t know of any reason why He shouldn’t answer my request, I pray with confidence that He will. But what if I’m wrong? Then I count on the Holy Spirit to intercede for me according to the will of God. (Rom. 8:26). Thus I don’t have to pray without expecting results and can count on God to do what’s best.
You may get the idea that praying this way might be tedious and drawn out. It can be. Or that it might be emotional and intense. Certainly. Or perhaps even bold and aggressive. Yes.
Prayer indeed changes things, and the greatest changes I’ve seen have been in me. Pray, and you can expect the same.
Copyright 2009 James McAlister
Thanks for the encouragement! I agree wholeheartedly, but have to admit that #3 especially is a hard one for me!
Thanks for sharing Mr. Mac! It was very helpful and applicable.
How comforting it was to be reminded that the same God that heard Hezekiah’s prayers is the same God who hears mine. I needed this reminder today. Thank you for your words….
James–In one of the books written by CS Lewis (probably Mere Christianity or Miracles), he says something to the effect that he considered the opportunity for prayer itself to be a miracle. That the creator of all that is would give each of us the opportunity to present our viewpoint to Him with the intent of influencing His actions is an enormous gift, demonstrates the regard in which He holds us, and is an absolutely underdeserved, unexplainable, unexpected, and incredible freedom He gives us.
Our prayer may not be answered when or how we wish it to be but the fact that we were able to present it, know he heard and considered it is astounding.
Thanks James for your insight on the power of intense, fervent, sincere prayer. I find myself talking to God frequently as I drive to and from work on my 1 hour commute. The scripture tells us to “Cry unto God” and he will hear the voice of his children. This was often the case as I besought the throne of behalf of my precious wife for her deliverance from pain and healing of her disease. That crying out continues today for my children and friends. It also includes a great deal of praise for His goodness and mercy. Thank you again for sharing from your personl experience. I needed that.